My thoughts in 40 hours.

Ok, maybe I had a 30-minute nap in between but generally I was up for 40 hours. I, myself, am impressed :P

I'll skip my family time and go straight to my night shift at Hospital Tengku Ampuan Rahimah. Its my first shift this summer but it already feels pretty familiar. The place, the wards and the atmosphere. By observing the patients and their family members, it always tells me to be thankful for what I have. To be happy with the life I was born with. To feel lucky to be able to afford slightly better healthcare. And for most parts, I am still trying to overcome my fear of blood. I am trying really hard, trust me. 

KPS's Area Competition 2013.

This is my first time attending Area Competition, not as a competitor that is. I've been promising to go since 2010 but I've never went because I had SPM Moral paper (2010), I went to the States (2011) and I had to balik kampung (2012). So finally, after so many years, I went for it. 

You know, I felt just as tensed as if I was a participant. Believe it or not, we don't know what to expect. Whether or not our juniors will be able to cope under the stress. A junior once told me "Senior, did you know the amount of stress that we are under? So far, no teams from Kwang Hua failed to enter competition, I hope our team will not be the first to break this tradition". What they didn't know was that there were quite a number of teams from Kwang Hua that lost in the past. Teams that were forgotten just because they lost and didn't get to give it a second try.

We have always been saying about how KH has always been winning and it is not as exciting and as worrying as it used to be back when we were competing because at that time, we had so many good competitors to go against. Our seniors always told us "eh, you must be careful of Bukit Kuda, MGS, STAJ and Raja Lumu! They have the best seniors and you must be prepared to compete with schools that were taught by officers and ex-state com participants". At that time, our seniors were only Area and State competitors but they did their best to teach us everything they can.

And honestly, the best part of yesterday was the winning of Batu Unjur's Nursing Cadet team. Congratulations :) Yes, its saddening that our cadet team lost by a mere 0.43% but when I think about how I won the State Competition by 0.25%, I decided to believe that its just purely luck. I was really sad to find out about the minute difference in the final score but what done, is done. Think of it more positively, SI is not the only competitor we have now. And seriously, other schools should now brave up and join area competition. You were given a real-life proof that KH does not always take the gold, we, can lose too. 

I am not saying this because I've never lost. I'm saying this because I lost more than any of them. I was lucky enough to be hand-picked by my seniors to represent KH and we were lucky enough that at that time, joining competition was a huge thing in KPS that we were treated like their most prized possessions. But my team, we never failed to disappoint all those friends and officers who placed their hopes on us. That's the worst stress to cope with - disappointing people who trusted you. 

Positive stress is always needed. If not, we will eventually start to take things for granted. Winning is not a given, neither is it a choice. I can't say there isn't effort but I'll say, maybe we need a little more luck, or maybe, others had a better chance.

In the end, everything happens for a reason.

Don't question the reason but take it to go another milestone.

Best wishes to all Kwang Hua-rians :)